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Streets of Santo Domingo |
For my first
spring break, I decided to forgo the classic Cancun experience for a much more
exotic and classy experience, so I booked an all booze-included package to a
resort in Punta Cana, Dominican Republic. I had the best of intentions of lying
on the resort beach for a week - I felt like I'd been on the go ever since July
last year and thought deserved a trip where I literally did nothing at all.
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Our resort |
But
I should have known that I would never be able to resist a bit of a caper in a
foreign country, so after a couple of lazy days at the resort, a friend and I
booked a tour to Santo Domingo.
So the next day, at 6:30,
grumbling and thoroughly resenting myself for not being able to lie on a beach,
we met our driver to start the 3hr trek from our cloistered resort to the capital.
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Sunrise through blurry eyes. |
There are 10mil
people in the Dominican Republic and 3mil live in Santo Domingo. The population
is incredibly diverse with most people being a hybrid of African American,
Caribbean, Spanish, Italian, French and anything else within boating distance of
the island in the colonial era.
DR was
founded by Christopher Columbus in 1492, and upon seeing it, he allegedly said
that it was "the most beautiful thing that his eyes had never seen"
(I suspect that this was a teensy mistranslation because I'm fairly sure
Columbus wasn't blind). He was so enchanted by the island that he wrote a
letter to his son Diego asking to be buried on it. Unfortunately, Diego snuffed
it before he could bring his dad back, so then the task fell to Diego's
widow.
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The Columbus Lighthouse |
Now we come to
a bit of a controversy - both the Spanish and Dominicans are adamant that they
have the body of the real Columbus. Either way, DR has built a lighthouse/tomb
to house their Columbus (Faro a Colón). The building is 210m long, and 60m
wide, and shaped light a cross. On top, there are a set of lamps which project
a cross into the sky that can be seen from Puerto Rico at night. Our guide
seemed to think that the huge monument was the decisive factor in proving
whether or not the real Columbus was buried there ('we would not have built
this if he was not really here"). Interestingly, the DR has repeatedly
refused to allow the bones within the lighthouse to be examined or tested
because they see it as being disrespectful towards the dead, while the Spanish
have performed extensive analysis on their remains and claim to have confirmed
that they have the real deal.
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Physical proof that I was there, and not drunk for the entirety of Spring Break. |
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The sideways view of the Columbus Lighthouse |
When Columbus
found DR, it was populated by the Taino people. Initially, relations between
the natives and Europeans were peaceful, but after a teensy bit of slavery and
other brutalities combined with European diseases, the entire native population
was destroyed. Although, in a somewhat bitter victory, the entire genetic
material of the Taino people was not lost "thanks" to a campaign of rape
against the local women.
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Scenery from the drive. This was used as a set in Apocalypse Now. |
So the Spanish
ruled DR until the late 1600s when the French charged in. Like gentlemen, Spain
and France decided to share the island, thus the French colony in Haiti was
formed. It all gets a little messy at this point, because the Spanish were
forced to cede DR to the French following the French Revolutionary Wars, but
then the Haitian slaves were revolting against France, so they claimed the
island, but then Napolean came to reassert power, but then lost it when
everyone died because of all the delightful tropical island diseases, and then
the Spanish got control back (with the help of the British) only to lose it to
the (now) Republic of Haiti. Haitian occupation continued until 1844 when a
group of Dominicans fought for, and declared national independence. But of
course, it wasn't that simple, the decades that followed where characterised by
short-term unstable governments. With the threat of another Haitian invasion
imminent, DR asked Spain to recolonise them. This was opposed vigorously within
the country, and (following pressure from the US), Spain de-re-colonised
DR.
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We had to stop for a toilet and coffee break. This was across the road.
Night club and car wash. Together at last. |
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I made a cat friend on a coffee break |
In the period
that followed, the nation's leader was a man by the name of General Ulises
Heureaux, nicknamed "Lilís". Despite being a tyrannical dictator,
Lilis was responsible for significant development within the DR through
modernising the agricultural sector. This was done at great cost, however, as
the General incurred over $35mil of debt, 15 times the local GDP. Lilis was
then assassinated by the military in 1899. After his death, subsequent
governments struggled to repay Lilis' debts, and the country eventually
declared bankruptcy. With the threat of European debt collectors invading, the
US intervened (in accordance with the Monroe Doctrine) to stablise the nation
and their own interests in the Latin American region (the Panama Canal was
being built).
In 1930,
General Rafael Leonidas Trujillo Molina came to power. Trujillo spearheaded
another period of modernisation and development in DR, and similarly to Lilis,
it was because he was a total jerk (as our guide said "he had no
respect for nobody"), who raped thousands of women, killed tens of
thousand more. But, horrible as it seems, Trujillo pretty much single-handedly
got DR's shit together. He completely paid of the nation's crippling debt,
while simultaneously embarking on ambitious public infrastructure projects. He
opened the nation's borders to Jewish people fleeing WW2, while at the same
time tightening borders with neighbouring Haiti and brutalising Haitians who
found themselves on the wrong side of the line. This policy culminated in the
Parsley Massacre where 20-30 thousand Haitians were killed simply for living
around the borderlands of the two nations. Trujillo's downfall came in 1961,
when opposition to his brutality rose to fever pitch in the wake of the murder
of the Mirabel sisters (the movie "In the time of the Butterfly"
tells their story - check it out). We actually drove past one of the assassin's
houses on our tour - apparently he's still as strong as a horse and still gets
out and about in Santo Domingo, despite creeping towards 100yrs. Since the
Trujillo era, DR hasn't had another dictator and the country's political
climate has stabilised, despite allegations of corruption.
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Statue paying tribute to the Mirabel sisters. |
DR is a baffling
combination of abject poverty with insane wealth. You have the resorts, which
resemble miniature cities, and offer every luxury under the sun (if you can
have the patience to deal with "Caribbean time"* when asking for it).
The airport at Punta Cana, the main resort drag, was built entirely by
private donations because the government was never entirely convinced that
holidays in a Caribbean paradise would catch on. Similarly, there are a series
of gated communities which shelter the rich from the reality of daily life in a
developing country. In Santo Domingo, there is a neighbourhood where houses all
cost in the millions (and Shakira has one!!!), with a Porsche, BMW and Ferrari
dealership, but then an average salary is between $200-500, and there is 30% unemployment.
Everywhere you go, there are people lining the streets selling things or their
skills (and in case you were wondering, not seedy skills, like mechanics and
things). The unemployment is so bad that it is difficult to keep young people
in the country - everyone aims to get a visa to anywhere as soon as they can.
In fact, the second largest "industry" in DR is money being sent home
from people who have managed to get out. The greatest success stories come from
students who manage to get baseball scholarships. Currently 30% of the US
Baseball League are Dominican, and every young Dominican hopes they will be
next. Driving around, everywhere where clusters of school kids wearing
knock-off pro league uniforms and playing baseball. They play every chance that
they get, and exercise obsessively in hopes of maybe making it to the big
leagues.
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Haitian workers clearing grass by the side of the road. |
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Small shop by the side of the road. |
Driving through
the countryside around our resort, there is further juxtapositioning. On one
hand, there are the lavish resorts which necessitate fancy industrial cooking
equipment, so there are huge industrial parks that line the road selling all
the things that are needed to maintain the tourism industry, but then there are
these shells of homes. Our guide enlightened us – while land is fairly cheap in
DR, building homes is often a life-long project. Bank loans collect interest at
a rate of 10-15% a month, so people often borrow incrementally (for example, to
build walls and a roof), and then work for years to pay off that debt before
borrowing again to put in plumbing or electricity. Speaking of electricity, DR
exists in a constant state of energy shortage. The electricity infrastructure
was built up largely in the time of Trujillo and hasn’t been maintained. As a
result, there are blackouts at least once a day, even in the big resorts. One
good thing about the neglect though, is that most houses aren’t metered – so
people get electricity either for free or pay a flat sum every month for the
connection.
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Power lines that have been broken open and rewired. |
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One of the partially-completed houses by the side of the road. |
Driving around
the city was incredible, and I was absolutely kicking myself for not bringing
my SLR with me (I’d read some reviews that security in our hotel wasn’t great,
and didn’t want to risk my baby getting wet or stolen). Santo Domingo is such a
visually interesting city. There are bright blue oceans, meeting white sands,
with palm trees, juxtaposed with flimsy houses and ancient ruins.
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We're pretty sure these guys were trying to rob this house. |
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The houses all have insane security to prevent people from climbing up and breaking in.
According to our guides, the people don't have much to do, so they get really good at climbing. |
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More security |
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Really intense security |
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A statue down near the harbour. |
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We're mature like that |
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The Supreme Court of Justice. #lawnerd |
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San Francisco Monastery Ruins |
The San
Francisco Monastery was built in 1508. And it was at this site that we got one
of the great gems of our trip. Context: Rachel and I were the youngest people
on the tour by at least 40 years, so supplementing our numbers were three
oldish couples. The oldies, we’ll call them Martha and Marvin, just couldn’t
understand (1) why the ruins fell down and (2) why they weren’t rebuilt. And I
mean, they were *really* confused. A good 5 minutes went into explaining to
them why the ruins were y’know, ruins.
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Who can spot the Green Parrot? |
This is the
Dominican China Town – funny how every Chinatown everywhere looks exactly the
same, right?
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Chinatown |
Further into
the city, we came to the Cathedral of Santa María la Menor, the oldest
cathedral in the Americas (North and South!). Dominicans are crazy religious –
like, over 90% of their population are practicing Catholic, religious. One of
the reasons for frictions between Dominicans and Haiti is their disparate
religions - Haitians tend to practice voodoo. A not-insignificant portion of the Dominican
population believes that the earthquake from a few years ago was actually caused
by the Haitian witchcraft.
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Cathedral of Santa Maria la Menor |
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How Catholic? They keep the Pope-Mobile from his last visit to this site on public display. |
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Another Cathedral |
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The Eternal Flame |
After a packed
morning of adventuring, it was time for lunch. In a cave. Turns out, I would be
spending a huge amount of time in caves during my week in Dominican (the
nightclub we went to was also located in a series of caves), because the entire
island was underwater until relatively recently (geologically speaking, so still a couple hundred/thousand centuries), so
there were all these subaquatic caves, that then became notaquatic caves when
the sea levels dropped. My lunch pretty much redefined delicious. It was so
delicious that I didn’t even get a photo of it, but it was magnificently juicy
steak with a tasty salad and roast potatoes. Hardly traditional fare – shoot me.
The true traditional dish of DR is called “The Flag” which is a combination of
meat and beans and rice served on a plate. Another option is a fish curry
called Maki Maki. I’m not sure if this is a Dominican thing, or just an everywhere-we-ate
thing, but all the food seems to be ridiculously salty. Except for my steak.
*drool*
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Inside the cave restaurant |
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View from outside the cave restaurant |
After lunch, we
made our way to the Parliament Palace, conveniently located across the road
from a plastic surgery clinic. Allegedly, we were supposed to have tea with the President, because he's "a friend of Leo's". I was deeply sceptical that Leo knows the President. But alas, I got my hopes up. And then we did not have tea with the President. I was crushed.
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The Parliamentary Palace |
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The Parliamentary Plastic Surgery |
I was told that my disappointment couldn't last for long, because we were going to the most beautiful place in all of Santo Domingo - the Spanish Square (also known as Parque Colon). The location of Diego Columbus' summer palace, a meeting place for all Dominicans to sit in the sun and listen to the free musical performances every weekend. We were told it was romantic. We were told it was magical. We were told it was beautiful.
It was not. I mean, it wasn't a total disaster zone, but the most beautiful place in Santo Domingo? Not by a long shot.
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I mean, like, it's not Baghdad. But also not hugely romantic. |
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Summer Palace |
With our expectations thoroughly lowered, we departed to our final destination for the day - another cave. This one was called Los Tres Ojos and it completely redeemed the day.
Deep below the surface are a series of limestone caves and lakes that were formed by tectonic activity centuries ago, but were only discovered by Westerners in 1916. The lakes are freshwater and fed by an underground river. It is thought that people used to bathe in the lakes, but the practice has been banned ever since the area became a national park. Regardless, it is thought that touching the water makes you lucky.
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Looking down |
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The first lake |
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Coral |
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Stalagmite/tite |
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We had to get in a boat to get across this one |
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Fish! |
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Second lake |
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The third lake - the Ladies Lake |
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Massive bees nest. |
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Dolphin carving! |
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Check it - Fish fossil |
It was a fantastic way to end the day. Well, there would have been one way that would have been a little better. See, our resort, whilst wonderful, was on the wrong side of the island to see the sunset, and the chances of us being awake in time to see the sunrise was approximately nil. We were pretty optimistic though that we'd be able to see the sun set over the water from Santo Domingo. And it nearly, nearly, nearly happened. Only we were driving at sunset, and turned off the coast road before it set.
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Our sunset. So close, and yet so far. |
Because we're masochists, one pre-sunrise wake-up wasn't enough though, and the next day we were again trundled into a taxi/van for another excursion - this time, to Saona Island, located a few kilometers off the coast of DR and nestled in the East National Park.
Driving through the countryside yet again (it had been a 3hr drive to Santo Domingo, but only about 2 to the launch point for Sauna), I noticed more of the countryside. For starters, yellow school buses, packed to the point of impossibility trundled past. The school buses however, are only for workers. Actual students have to walk to school. This creates problems, because while education is free for all Dominican children (up to secondary school), clearly, there is still a long way to go in making schools accessible. And public transport isn't really a thing, even in the city. There is a subway line, but it is pretty
short (16km) at the moment, so it isn’t hugely useful. Instead, there are random cars who drive around and pick people up and take them places.
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We stopped by a cathedral on the way |
We also passed through towns that looked a bit like slaughter houses, with entire pig bodies hanging from more or less every available surface (pig is "like turkey for Americans. Someone's birthday? We eat a pig. Someone's wedding? We eat a pig"). The Dominicans have to cure their meats though because of the sporadic energy, and also because most people don't have fridges. So the pigs are seasoned heavily with salts and herbs. Apparently, the meat stays good for about 13 days this way.
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On the topic of local food, this is Mamajuana, the traditional Dominican drink.
1/2 Rum, 1/4 Red Wine, 1/4 Honey + Misc roots and herbs. Surprisingly, not the worst thing I've tasted.
Dominicans say that taking a shot of this after every meal helps digestion and fends off illness. They practically force-feed it to you after meals at the resorts. |
Eventually, we arrived at port - an idyllic little beach.
From there, we jumped onto our luxury catamaran for a leisurely (and boozy) cruise out to Saona Island. We were... uh... entertained by our lively crew who insisted on dancing with everyone on the boat. Considering that I'm not much of a hugger, you can imagine how much I loved being ground against by a total stranger on a boat in front of 40 strangers. And it got even better when a crew member dressed in drag and proceeded to dry hump pretty much everything on the boat. It was... well. Maybe I'm just not their target audience. But it was absolutely lovely just to lie on the boat.
Once we got to the island...There isn't much to write. It was just plain paradise.
After a few hours of lounging, we got onto our speed boat to go back to the "natural swimming pool" (as advertised by our tour brochure). Turns out, it was just a big shallow bay, but when you're in heaven, who complains about semantics? Here, we got to play with starfish (as much as you can play with them - they do have little suckers on their feet). And then after another speedboat trip, and a bit of snorkeling, it was back onto shore, into the van and on our way back to our resort.
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*Caribbean time
= the idea that time is completely unnecessary and urgency isn’t a thing
that exists. Applies to all aspects of life, including dancing in the resort's (completely hilarious) tribute to musical theatre. If you have never seen a
black man lip synching to Julie Andrews, you simply have not ever experienced
hilarity.
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The petals of a flower that is native to DR. Apparently Oscar de lar Renta uses this as a base for some of his scents. |
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We stopped by this colonial-era house that has been renovated into a luxury hotel. |